Stories From YolandaWorld
Stories from YolandaWorld
Log-line for TV/film possibilities: The trans-femme main character's husband of 20yrs dies in her arms from a heart attack, while she has visions of other lives in other dimensions with him, visions of men in her life pre-trans, as supernatural encounters of his Soul's essence preparing her for their relationship and the shift of humanity from The Kali Yuga into The Satya Yuga.
Plot line for TV/Film possibilities: Yolanda's husband, Glen, dies in her arms. She decides to leave NYC after 20yrs, leaving all of her friends and accomplishments and move to her and her husband's property in VT they called Gloryland to start a new life at 68yrs old with no running water, no electricity, no partner, no friends to a vintage 1967 mobile home, and sorting out all of the necessities of life- a drilled well for water, a line for electricity, as well as sorting out her sexual/spiritual/inter-dimensional experiences, which are outlined here in the stories below. These stories/experiences present themselves as "flashbacks" during Glen's death process of being in Yolanda's arms at home, calling 911, and being on life support until his Mom arrives to say goodbye. I see these flashbacks during the death process as episodes in the series. The flashbacks serve as character development of the main character, who has a history of adaptability after personal disasters, but is devastated by her Soul mates' death in a way not experienced before. After the memorial service in NYC, She moves to Gloryland a few months before a fascist convicted felon pedophile is elected to the presidency of the US, throwing ALL of the US and world into chaos (the darkest hour before the dawn of the Satya Yuga). Yolanda becomes (almost) a solitary monk like person receiving spiritual non dual teachings, until taking a walk in the woods behind her house and encountering a Sadhu looking person who says to call them Avalokitesvara (Glen's favourite Deity). She asks "who are you and what are you doing here?" He answers "Who are YOU and what are YOU doing here"? "I don't know"-she says. He says "Sing... sing until you can't sing anymore. This will help usher in the new era". Then he disappears. Yolanda forms a band called Rev. Yolanda and The Circle of Love, and sings and sings and sings everywhere that will have her. Her fans describe her performances as "spiritual happenings" because of the high vibration of the music and message. She keeps singing until she approaches her 80th birthday. At her 80th birthday concert, she begins to sing her song "Love Divine", when she sees a circle of light glowing above her head. She collapses onstage into the arms of her backup singer (she and Glen's best friend Doreen). She passes of an unexpected heart attack.
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A brief overview: Yolanda was born as Roger Anthony Mapes (nicknamed "Tony") in Muscle Shoals, Alabama -The Hit Recording Capital of The World. Tony joined a Jesus Freak Hippie Commune called "The Jesus Manor", and his first band, "Amplified New Testament", when he was only 17 years old, and still a "he".
At age 28, "Tony Mapes" moved to New York City and began exploring theatre and performance art in the 80's East Village arts scene. During this exploration he (still a "he") met The Radical Faeries in NYC and moved to a Radical Faerie Community in Vermont. It was during this time that Yolanda -trans femme gender queer- was truly born (now a "she").
Yolanda developed a loyal following in Vermont with her Public Cable Access TV Show (with sister drag performer Cherie Tartt) called The Cherie and Yolanda Show. She also developed her original musical blend of rock, pop, country and jazz with her band Yolanda & The Plastic Family and celebrated the release of her first CD Welcome To Yolanda World .
In 1999 Yolanda was invited to be a regular performer at CBGB's new Queer music night "Homocorps". In 2001 Yolanda moved back to NYC. She rocked the downtown scene in NYC performing at Meow Mix, CBGB's, Webster Hall, The Duplex, Sidewalk Cafe, and The Cutting Room. In 2003 Yolanda was awarded OutMusician of the Year , and recorded a critically acclaimed solo cover of the ABBA tune "Lay All Your Love on Me" on the Abbalicious CD (FigJam Records).
By 2003 Yolanda met the love of her life Rev. Glen Morton Ganaway aka Satyre "Your Favorite Anarchist Preacher his bio HERE
Glen and Yolanda were a force of nature and a true team. They were together 21 years before Glen's passing in 2024.
Yolanda was inducted into the GLBT Hall of Fame for Activism, Art Excellence and Community Awareness in 2005. It was around this time that Yolanda began a spiritual journey which led her to One Spirit Interfaith Seminary where she became Rev. Yolanda, an ordained Interfaith Minister in June of 2011. That same year the song "I Wanna Know" from her CD House of Joy made it to #1 on the OutVoice Music Charts and "Love Divine" was included on a special first edition collection of GLBT Christian singer/songwriters.
Rev. Yolanda's Old Time Gospel Hour -the live, autobiographical Gospel Music show was realized in January of 2014 and awarded with a MAC Award. She also released another album-Country Gospel Kirtan. "Home" from that album was voted the #1 song of 2013 on the OutVoice Music Charts.
Rev. Yolanda 2026 is featured in a guest star role in a new Ryan Murphy Sci-Fi TV series “The Beauty” starring Ashton Kucher and Isabella Rossellini – details HERE
Rev. Yolanda has also been seen on HBO''s "High Maintenance", "Family Stories" for the Discovery Channel playing Vivian Wheeler (the current Guiness Book of World Record-holder for bearded lady), and a feature film about her life by director Ike Allen released in 2015. 2015-Present, Rev. Yolanda is an actor on 3 web-series "Skeleton Crew", "The Art of Blowing It", Demon Doctor", as a recurring series regular, and still recording new music. For more info on Rev. Yolanda's stage and screen appearances GO HERE.
Chpt 1- Alien Love Child:
song: Alien Love Child https://yolanda.net/track/2914760/alien-love-child
I was born in The Muscle Shoals area (Muscle Shoals, Tuscumbia, Sheffield, Florence) of North Alabama- The Hit Recording Capital of the World.
Song: Muscle Shoals: video:https://youtu.be/tJoF_MM1108?si=FpsMXIy4EGMXCIVp audio: https://yolanda.net/track/3004788/muscle-shoals
*My birth name is Roger Anthony Mapes, and my parents/family/friends always called me Tony. I called myself Tony until I was in my late 30’s*
The Family:
L to R: Mom : Carolyn, Brother: Chris, Dad: Bill, Me as Tony
My first memory is in my crib. The window was open and a “bird” flew into the open window and sat on the windowsill looking at me for a moment or two, then flew away. In that moment, pre verbal, I had a remarkable sense of what I now call The Divine. I remember having a feeling of safety, security and purpose in life. All of these above comments are how I now interpret the pre-verbal memory. What was this vision- God/Angel/Alien ?
Song Alien Love Child:https://youtu.be/sCsdIpBPccs?si=MQDNvMA8oe8M4R1M
My second earliest memory is when I’m in kindergarten or 1st grade at our family’s lake house in the Summer. I remember waking up early in the morning 3-4am ish seeing the face of a grey alien. Their arms extended with me seemingly in their arms being placed into bed by them. I felt serene, and safe. After putting me in bed, they left the room via dematerializing up through the ceiling like steam or like a “beam me up Scotty” scenario. After the dematerialization, I heard my Mom’s voice screaming in the other room. What happened to both of us? Visitation by an Angel? Alien Abduction? As an adult, I asked my Mom if she remembered that night at the lake house. She said she did. She described a nightmare where a “monster” was in her bedroom trying to molest her. She woke up Dad screaming in fear. Below is a painting I made many years later about the event:
My parents were local celebrities on TV, and in the Muscle Shoals music business.
Mom and Dad and me. I was in high school here. My brother isn’t in the picture- he was at college. I don’t have many pics of me and my brother because he was never a part of my life.
Song Muscle Shoals: https://youtu.be/tJoF_MM1108?si=8WTgIiX8rW5JUo1B
Me in elementary school
Social status was very important to my parents, therefore as I grew up and began to understand that I was queer, I became an embarrassment to them. In 4th grade, I read a Time Magazine article called “Homosexuality in America”. The article itself was derogatory, but the word homosexual resonated with me. The article used the word to describe all LGBTQAI people. At that time there was no language for trans/non binary people -which is what I am. The way the word homosexual was used in the article resonated for me because it was the first word I ever heard that seemed to describe who I was. I knew at the time that I was not a boy, but I was also not quite a girl. I knew myself to be feminine in the body everyone called “boy”. I was excited about the word homosexual, so I took the Time Magazine article and stood up for Show and Tell and told the class “I'm a homosexual”. I felt so proud....but.... then all hell broke loose. I was sent to the principal's office. My parents were called. A meeting ensued where the principal told my parents to straighten me out. They took me home and made me throw out my Barbie dolls. My thoughts were -why did they give them to me in the first place if they were so offensive for me to have.
At school, the principal was one of my most constant bullies along with a guy named Sam and another guy named Kelly. The principal would greet me as I walked into school each morning making fun of whatever I was wearing at the time (I was always fashion conscious) and calling me a sissy in front of the other kids. This emboldened Sam to laugh and taunt me every chance he could. I did have a friend named Kevin who liked me, and his family was very kind to me. Both Kevin and I were in the marching band and Kevin beat Sam over the head with his clarinet case one day in my defence. Thanks Kevin! Kelly pushed me into a wall and broke one of my front teeth out. No one cared, not the school, not my brother who attended the same school , not even my parents. They just acted like it was my fault and took me to the dentist.
My parents acted like they were ashamed of me and devised a “program” to make me a “normal boy”. I was supposed to play football, or be on the swim team like my brother, or learn to shoot guns. I was horrified by it all. This went on from 4th grade to 8th grade.
One thing I definitely appreciate during these years is that my parents realized how committed to making art I was- all the while trying to “change me into a boy”. I think because I was so obsessed with Pablo Picasso, and wanted to be a painter like him, it seemed ok for some reason for me to pursue my artistic talent. The Muscle Shoals area was full of artists and musicians and I began to take private art lessons in the 5th grade. Here is a painting I made in 6th grade for my father's birthday:
Also being in the marching band helped a little but the bullying was steady until 9th grade.
me in 9th grade:
Chptr 2: Puberty teen years- a sexual/spiritual awakening
My Dad accepted a job in Florida. By this time I was in high school. We moved and I joined a new high school in my junior year, where there was an extra curricular Christian group called Young Life. The leader of this group was a 20-something “Hippie Jesus Freak” named Lindsey. He played the guitar. He looked exactly like Jesus to me. I think of him as my “first love”. I wanted to be around him all the time and he taught me how to play the guitar. He was straight but he was not judgmental of my affection for him. His goal was to “lead me to the Lord”. … so.... the Young Life group was going on a ski trip to North Carolina that Winter. I went to the retreat and of course was assigned to bunk with Lindsey. One night after a long day of being in group talks about Jesus and salvation, I was in bed barely sleeping. Lindsey got up to go to the bathroom in his underwear and nothing else. I saw him and was galvanized to his almost naked form. When he came out of the bathroom I was sitting up in bed. He saw me and asked me “don't you think it's time for you to come to the Lord?”. I was overcome with sexual energy and fell on my knees in front of him. When I looked up at him, there was an overhead light just behind his head. It created a halo around his head and I was overcome. I seemed to have an experience of actually seeing a scantily clad Jesus on the cross (Lindsey's arms were outstretched). I started crying uncontrollably and between sobs said “oh yes oh yes Jesus please save me.” This seemed to satisfy Lindsey and he hugged me tightly. This experience awakened my sexuality and spirituality all at once. However, it is important to note that NO sexual event happened that night. Lindsey was NOT a sexual predator. He was a sincere and very kind man. Soon after the retreat, Lindsey put distance between us. He said he had done all he could do for me. He suggested I start going to a “Hippie Jesus Freak” church/commune in town called The Jesus Manor.
I visited the commune and loved it. They had a band called The Amplified New Testament and they invited me to join the band. I did, and rapidly became enmeshed with this group of people. In the meantime, my Dad and mom decided to move back to Alabama, because Dad's job in Florida had ended (and because he discovered that Mom was having an affair-this was earth shattering for him). They moved back to Alabama. I was in my senior year in high school. They let me stay in Florida and said I could move into the commune at Jesus Manor.
3 above pics- me at The Jesus Manor
I moved into the commune and shared a room with one of my band-mates named Roger (which is my birth name). I fell head over heels in love with him. He was a dreamy blonde who played the guitar also. We became inseparable. We both understood that there was a sexual energy between us. He was “straight” (maybe Bi) and we spent all of our free time together, getting closer and closer and more physically demonstrative-hugging a lot, hand holding: Song Love Divine: https://youtu.be/JTnRKCflC44?si=nIdlARn3pAydvZmK
I made him a hand made hard cover book with the lyrics of the song You’ve Got A Friend handwritten inside with watercolor drawings of him and I doing things together. I worked so hard on that book and gave it to him for his birthday. He was moved to tears.
People began to be suspicious of us. He felt the pressure. Later on, a very attractive young Japanese-American woman moved into the commune and he started pursuing her. I was heartbroken and proclaimed my love for him. He rejected my love. He and Yuriko began to date and become a couple. I was heartbroken, and felt ashamed because other folks in the commune became judgmental about how close I felt to him . It was obvious that I was Queer and that I was in love with him. That didn't sit well with the commune folks, and I felt like it was time for me to leave. My parents didn't know about this but they pressured me to return to Alabama and go to college where my Dad had a new job. I felt humiliated by my experience with Roger, so I did move back.
In a very surprising turn of events... many many years later.....Roger and I reconnected on Facebook. He had divorced Yuriko and was living alone in Colorado. He contracted cancer and was dying. One night in 2017 he video called me on Facebook. He explained that he was dying and wanted me to know before he died that he loved me too all those many years ago, and that he still had the book I made him.
L to R: Roger, our friend Patty, me 1976
Roger 2016
Chptr 3: College/Sex/Show Biz
I moved back to Alabama and enrolled in the college where my Dad worked. Since I was still spiritually-minded, I searched for a spiritual group to join. I found the Baptist Student Union. There I met my next band Stained Glass BlueGrass. I started playing with them and we played all over the state at churches and music festivals. There was a tall red headed banjo player named Sammy who I fell in love with. This was a similar situation to my relationship with Roger. Sammy was “straight” but obviously loved me too. It became uncomfortable for him, so he put distance between us. He told the leader of the band about my attraction to him. They both became homophobic and told me I was a sinner. Me and Sammy below:
At this point I had had enough with church and spiritual people, so I left the band and left the Baptist Student Union, and changed to a double major in Fine Arts/Painting and Theater Performance where I began to make huge paintings and be cast in musicals and dramas.
Here are some panting from college days:
I loved making art and being in theater and loved the people I met. No one was “out” or said anything about queerness, but it was obvious to me that my professor was gay and many of the guys in the department were gay. I was cast in a musical production and became friends with a guy named Glen (a foreshadowing of my future husband). A similar situation ensued. Glen was “straight” with a girlfriend, but we were inseparable. Glen was in a fraternity Sigma Chi. The fraternity rushed me and I joined. Glen became my “Big Brother”.
Glen Fretwell, my “big Brother”, and I:
Glen Fretwell singing-college days:
We became closer and closer and I started spending the night with him and his girlfriend at her apartment. I slept on the couch while they slept (had sex?) in the bedroom. Finally one day, Glen invited me to spend the night with him at his house...just me and him. At this time, I had never had sex with anyone. I was 25 yrs old. I just never thought much about sex. I was always more interested in the heart/spirit connection with a guy. I felt sexual feelings but the physical acts that were available for exploration never occurred to me. I never dreamt about sex or saw porn or knew anything about the sexual world.
Glen's house was locked and he left his key inside so he had to climb through the window and told me to follow him through the window. It was Summer and he was wearing short shorts with no underwear. As he crawled through the window, his shorts rode up and his full well endowed genitalia was on display. I was beside myself as I crawled in through the window behind him. I was in a state of obvious excitement that sparked Glen's interest....so....since we were alone in the house, He initiated my very first sexual experience. He said “let's go watch TV in my bedroom’. I’m like “SURE”. We stretched out on his bed and started watching TV. Soon, Glen pulled out his stuff and reached for my hand to place it on his stuff”. I was so freakin excited. We only did oral sex, but that was plenty and in my inexperience, I thought this was the only sex that existed. I had no clue about anything anal. Immediately after he was satisfied, it seemed he felt guilty very quickly. He ripped the sheets off the bed and put them in the washer, changed the bed, and we went into the living room. I left soon after when his folks came home.
I was hooked, Glen was everything to me. To my surprise, he didn't reject me. He included me in his relationship with Jan. The 3 of us never had sex together. In fact, Glen never initiated any more sexual activity with me, but I didn't care. It didn’t affect my feelings for him. Eventually all 3 of us graduated with theater degrees and auditioned together and were all 3 cast in our very first jobs in show business that Summer, at a theme park in Memphis Tennessee called Libertyland . One of my shows at Libertyland featured me as an Elvis impersonator. I was in 3 shows. Unfortunately I don’t have a pic of the Elvis show, but I do have a pic of me and fellow cast-mates in the other 2 shows:
As the Summer moved on, Glen decided he was indeed straight, and he and Jan moved to Nashville together to pursue music, and 3 years later, I moved to NYC to be a “star”.
Glen and I are still friends to this day after reconnecting on Facebook many years later (like Roger). Glen left Jan, started living a gay male life, moved to LA, had a brief film career” and fell in love with a semi famous actor. They are still together and living in West Hollywood.
Glen Fretwell and I many years later in NYC at a dinner where Glen Fretwell met Glen Ganaway (my husband- our relationship discussed later on in the story) :
L to R: Jan's roommate, me, Glen, Jan at Libertyland
I stayed in Memphis 3 more years to do graduate study in theater at The University of Memphis. During that time I was all over Memphis doing local and regional theater. Memphis is a powerhouse of Theater. Kathy Bates is from Memphis as well as Cybil Sheppard. While in Memphis I forgot about Glen when I met a boy named Tim Brown, who was also involved in local theater, and fell in love. We moved in with each other and spent those 3 years together. Sexy Tim below:
Chptr 4: NYC in the 80's
I moved to NYC in 1983. The AIDS epidemic was in full swing. I was a newbie to NYC and the LGBTQAI community. There are themes in my life that repeat and intensify in NYC. I have always been boy crazy and fascinated with God/Spirituality/Angels/Aliens. So with those things in mind…the next 10 years in NYC go like this:
SEX CRAZY!!!!! This is the first time that I’ve been around a real LGBTQAI community. Men everywhere, and easy pickins! Sex is available everywhere- on the street, on the Pier, in public restrooms, in libraries, in bookstores, movie houses, porn shops, bath houses- you get it. AIDS spreads like wildfire and people die around me but I’m hooked on sex and keep on keeping on.
Song Primal Sensation: https://yolanda.net/track/2435658/primal-sensation
My best friend at the time, Tony (my nickname) from Alabama (my home state) who I met in Memphis while working at Libertyland, moved to NYC in 1986 and we became inseparable but not in a romantic way. We looked alike and sounded alike and both were Queer and both got jobs at the same restaurant and said we were cousins…and from then on we WERE CUZZINS. Tony’s passion was to become big in the fashion world, so everyone called him “Tony Fashion”. I wanted to be a famous actor/singer songwriter/performance artist so everyone called me “Tony Art”. We were Tony and Tony all over town. We stayed out all night, drinking, smoking pot, and having sex on the Piers, in Central Park, at bookstores, movie houses- all the while pursuing our careers.
Tony finally got a job at Ford Models being an apprentice under Eileen Ford. She taught him everything about the modelling business. In less that 5 years, Tony became a well known model talent scout with a world travelling career. He travelled the world 5 times and established the modelling careers of many famous models, and even discovered Ashon Kutcher working as a bartender in the Midwest and signed him as a model for his early career before he became a TV/Film star (later in this story, I become a guest star on a TV show where Ashton is the star of the series).
I went to Musical Theater school at The American Musical and Dramatic Academy. I graduated and started auditioning for everything. My most memorable audition was for Oh Calcutta where I sang “Don’t Rain On My Parade” and performed a monologue about masturbation. I didn’t get the part…I didn’t get anything that I auditioned for. My thought was that I was so Queer and the BIZ was not ready.
I moved to the East Village and began exploring my edgy artist self. I met a blonde blue eyed well endowed rock star artist type and fell head over heels in love. Here’s how we met:
I was working at an edgy downtown gay newspaper-The NY Native- that was trying to uncover and prove how AIDS was created in a government lab. The main way we made money was through our classified ads department, and I was the manager of that department. I was looking for a boyfriend (as usual), so I put an ad in for myself. I got many responses, and Brian was the star of the show. I opened his letter and there was a full nude body shot of him in his glory. I responded and we decided to meet. He told me to meet him at an art gallery on E. 6th st called The Lubo Restovsky Gallery. When I got there, I saw an old man bent over with a cane, grey hair and a black overcoat. He said that he was Lubo Restovsky. Brian was downstairs busy and would be with me soon. Lubo said “relax and look around the gallery. Brian will be with you in a moment.” So I waited about 10 mins and was about to leave when this amazing rock star looking artist came into the room and said “Hi, I’m Brian. I was dressed as Lubo Restovsky because I wanted to check you out before I decided if I wanted to go out with you. You PASSSED! “ I nearly busted my guts laughing! He was absolutely beautiful and hilarious, if a bit conceited. We went on a date and I was hooked-AGAIN-to another boy.
Brian Pride with his clothes on:
I moved in with him in his basement apartment under the gallery on East 6th street on the same street that “CIub Cummings” is now. I met Brian Pride as a preppy, good looking college boy type. He bleached and chopped up my hair, gave me hipster spandex pants with Elvis screen-printed on them and taught me all things about how to be an East Village Artist. He was the first to see the feminine in me and loved it. He was also the first person to introduce me to “New Age Spirituality”. We used crystals, and positive affirmations to create our life together. We started a business selling “jewellery” made of trash we found on the street. We embedded said trash in polymer and added dried seahorses and rhinestones- made earrings out of them. They were wonderfully weird and we did well. Brian was quirky, funny, handsome, a great sex partner, creative and totally wild. He did exactly what he wanted, and liked to drink and party. I think he was manic depressive, because he would be on VERY high HIGHS, and then deep deep LOWS. I had 2 best friends at the time who did NOT like Brian - (Tony and a new friend Larry who worked with me at The NY Native). During a period when Brian was on a very low LOW, I came home one night and found a “suicide note” (later I found out he didn’t really mean to write that note. He was drunk or high when he did it and thought it was funny). That night scared me and I called my friend Larry. Larry lived in the Bronx, but said to me “I’ll be right there”. He got in a cab and came to the basement on E. 6th st with a bunch of big garbage bags. We put all my stuff in those bags and went to Larry’s house in the Bronx. Larry lived with his parents and he put me up in his bedroom and I stayed with him and his family, until I could find another place to live. Brian came back to the basement and I wasn’t there. He called me at work on Monday and begged me to come back. I said no, and over the next few weeks, he sent handmade presents to me at the office and at Larry’s house, and came to visit me bringing me a leather jacket that he had embroidered (or found the embroidery somewhere) of a ram- signifying my birth name Roger Anthony Mapes aka RAM. on the back in order to entice me to come back to him. I said “no” and that was the end of our relationship. I still have one of the presents he made me during that time.
After Brian, my life changed big time. I was now an East Village artist! I started creating art and music and searched for a music producer and galleries to show my work. I wound up finding both and was on my way to success - I thought. I was still with Larry and family in the Bronx. They were so supportive of my career goals. I realized I needed to move back to the East Village to be available to my new found music producer who was in the process of getting me signed to Chrysalis Records. Me in the 80’s NYC:
I found a place to live on Ave. C in a shabby building that was a rooming house for gay men. A “commune style” living situation run by an alcoholic landlord who wanted to have sex with everyone who moved in. I left my job at the NY Native and started working at a Lesbian bar/restaurant where I met King Stormé DeLarverie who was a Stonewall Riots veteran and famous Drag King. Storme' and I fell into a wonderful friendship. She loved and protected me. I told her about living in the commune house and she warned me that it wasn’t a good place for me to be. She was correct. First off, I got scabies from living there. Next, soon after I moved in, the landlord went on an alcoholic rage and tried to bust down my door. I sat on the floor inside my room terrified with my feet firmly planted on the door to keep him from breaking through. It worked. He went away. The next day, I called Larry to tell him what happened and what Storme’ said to me. Larry, once again, came to my rescue and took me back to the Bronx with him.
I didn’t stay long in the Bronx this time. I found another rooming house on E. 13th. I moved in and by this time, I had paintings I had made, and lots of “fancy” clothes. Unknown to me it was a crack house, and as I was moving in, many of my clothes and paintings were stolen. I didn’t know what to do, because I didn’t have much money so I stayed there, thinking that my deal with Chrysalis Records would come through any day, and I would have enough funds to find a decent place. My producer gave me great hope about Chrysalis. They released funds for her to produce my single “Tell Me Lies”. I felt AMAZING! We went to Electric Lady studio to record my song! I was on my way!!! I could leave the crack house soon!! After the song was recorded, mixed, and ready to be released, Chrysalis backed out of the deal, and soon after, the record label folded. My producer and I were left hanging. We couldn’t get another label to pick up our project. It all crashed around me. I was still in the crack house with my dreams shattered. Soon, I landed a new job at a celebrity chef restaurant and started making good money. Then, I finally found an apartment that I could afford way up in Washington Heights -close to The Cloisters.
At this point, I threw myself into New Age Spirituality (while still pursuing a steady stream of boyfriends) . I found many new teachers and learned new points of view never before explored. I discovered A Course In Miracles and saw Marianne Williamson at a space in Manhattan where a weekly healing circle happened. I became devoted to affirmations that Louise Hay suggested and I still do this list of affirmations every day 40-something years later. I wrote a song called “I Love Myself" about these particular affirmations here: https://youtu.be/dlZoBmIu_zU?si=odktQJi9E4C9cGZl
I also got involved with Shamanic Drumming and Journeying. I took classes with a Jewish Kabbalah teacher who taught me how to read Tarot cards based on The Tree of Life. I then got a job at The Barbizon Hotel as their tarot card reader. The cards told me that I would meet a new love that would completely turn my world upside down.
That happened when I visited a dear friend who lived in Memphis who was involved in local theater. She had a dinner party at her house and there I met an 18 yr old high school senior who my friend had just directed in a play. I was in my mid 30’s. This boy named John was 18 yrs, and once again, blonde, blue eyed, well endowed and was obviously putting the moves on me. We left the party and went to his parents house where he was still living in an addition to his family home with a private entrance. We had an unforgettable night together, and he asked me if, after he graduated, he could move to NYC and live with me. I said yes and this started the next chapter of craziness. Upon his graduation, I rented a moving van, drove to Tennessee, and moved him into my apartment in NYC. He decided he wanted to go to Beauty School and someday open his own beauty salon. I said I would help him in any way I could. I was mesmerized by how beautiful and sexy he was. I was under his spell. So I started working 2 restaurant jobs, while still pursuing my art and music and navigating a love relationship with a 19 yr old. After he moved in with me, he showed/surprised me he was also a beautiful drag queen named Sandra Dee. Me and Sandra Dee:
I had never had much experience with drag up until that point-EXCEPT in college when Sigma Chi asked me to enter a drag show called “The Ugly Man Contest” to compete against other fraternities. I didn’t win the contest. This pic below shows me in the top3. I'm in the middle. #6 won the contest.
Back to John/Sandra….So here I was with 2 jobs, and a 19 yr old drag queen boyfriend who aspired to be a beauty salon owner. Life was crazy busy fun and filled with wonder at what I had gotten myself into.
John was also into New Age Spirituality, and was fascinated with all the options that were available in NYC at the time. The craziest New Age encounter that we had during this period involved meeting a channeler named Clyde Nocerino, who channeled Marilyn Monroe, Darth Vader, and beings from The Pleiadian Star system. I was told that I was a being of love and light directly from The Pleiades with a mission of spreading that love and light through music and song. This channeler also told me that in this existence on Earth, I was both male and female in one body. That message struck me deeply and I began to remember my puberty where I realized that I did indeed have this feminine personality and that my love for men was similar to how a cis-gendered female loved a cis-gendered male. How oddly wondrous- here I was in a relationship with a male bodied guy who dressed as a female some of the time we were together. (I think now that this relationship with John/Sandra was an out-picture of how I wanted to present myself in the world. Which began to happen in the chapter AFTER John.)
This channeling session excited both me and John, and we created a band called The Extensions (I had long butt length braided extensions in my hair ). The Extensions below:
Me-R, Margie-Middle, John/Sandra-L
I also wrote a musical called Alien Night Journeys where the theme song of this series of stories “Alien Love Child" was created: https://yolanda.net/track/2435649/alien-love-child
and this painting was created:
The play was a flop…LOL! John went to Beauty School and met another young man much closer to his age and got romantically involved with him. John didn’t tell me about his new romance, but did begin to pull away from me. I was way too attached to John and I had a difficult time letting go. Finally John left for good, finished Beauty School and moved back to Tennessee to get involved with an older man who provided the funds for John to open up the Salon he always wanted.
I was crushed after John’s departure. This made me question my life in NYC because I thought I had failed at everything I tried to do. My 2 best friends Cuzzin Tony and Larry, both landed AMAZING jobs. Larry became the dance music editor of Billboard magazine and Tony was always on world-wide scouting missions to find the next top model. I was a “starving artist” with 2 waitering jobs that exhausted me. I never broke through in the music or art business or theater or film and TV - all of which I wanted to do. By this time it was late 80’s early 90’s. In 1992, I met The Radical Faeries. The Radical Faeries are an international group of people of all genders-below the radar- who embody drag, and earth based Spirituality. How I first found out about the Radical Faeries:
Tony and I loved to smoke pot and watch Manhattan Neighborhood Network Public Access TV. We always watched it after the news on NY1 because we loved the woman who did the Lottery numbers after the news. Her name was Yolanda Vega and we loved her…. All of NYC loved her. She was hilarious, energetic, beautiful and so much fun! Tony started calling me Yolanda and that's how I got my name. After watching the lottery with Yolanda Vega one night, we stumbled across a documentary on Manhattan Neighborhood Network about The Radical Faerie Community in the Tennessee mountains. They were dressed in drag and dancing around a Maypole. I was hooked. I had to find them. I called an LGBTQAI group in Nashville to see if anyone had heard of them. I was told they were also in Brooklyn and gave me a phone number. It was an answering machine that had a message on it telling where their next meet was. It was Summertime, so they were meeting at the nude area on Jones Beach. I decided to go out there and meet them, and that started the next chapter…..
Chptr 5- VERMONT where Yolanda was born!
After meeting Faes in Brooklyn, I was told that a new commune was forming in Vermont. I decided to go to Northfield VT to meet the group that was starting the commune. I went and was fascinated with the group and the beautiful state of Vermont. I returned to NYC, packed my bags, and moved to Destiny Lodge within a month. That was the Fall of 1993.
I lived with the folks in the commune and (once again) fell in love with one of my roommates who had similar physical blonde blue eyed well endowed characteristics as the rest of my “true loves”. As fate would have it, one of the other roommates pissed off the landlord who made us all leave. My new love, Chris, and I moved to Burlington.
Chris was a master manipulator, and since I was in love with him, he had the perfect foil for his manipulations. He had me twisted around his little finger. It turned out to be the most destructive relationship I had ever been in, but it didn't start that way. He told me he loved me and teased me with his sexuality but never let me touch him. It drove me crazy and kept me close to him in order to find the time and place where he would give himself to me. It never happened, but what did happen was twisted. We both participated in the twistedness so I can't blame him completely. He would ask me to drive him everywhere because he had no car. He regularly wanted to go to the bathhouses in Montreal. He would let me watch him have sex with people, but would not let me join in. It was excruciating and finally ended our relationship … but it lasted 5 years.
The upside of our relationship was that he helped me find local musicians and we formed my first successful band called Yolanda and The Plastic Family. This is our first album - where practically every song was about Chris: https://yolanda.net/album/1302104/welcome-to-yolandaworld
The band became very popular as I established myself as an out loud and proud drag queen named Yolanda. This was at a time in Vermont when drag and trans folk were not as visible as we are today in 2025. It made a big impact on the Burlington area and we travelled all over the state playing in different towns, including Brattleboro.
In addition to the band, I developed a local Cable Access TV Show called the Cherie and Yolanda Show with my new drag queen friend Steven aka Cherie Tart: https://yolanda.net/cherieandyolanda The Show was a big hit in the area and boosted our popularity all over the state. We did many appearances together across the state. My favorite was when we visited the Tunbridge World's Fair and met Fred Tuttle, star of the movie “Man With A Plan”. Fred adored Cherie Tartt!!!
My local celebrity status grew and I wound up in a book called Legendary Locals of Burlington, alongside Bernie Sanders:
At some point in 1994, I began to notice that I was fatigued all the time. I chalked it up to being so busy. Then I contracted shingles and the Dr suggested I have an HIV test. I was diagnosed with HIV (not surprising after all my sexcapades in 80s NYC). I started taking meds. became a client of Vermont Cares and began working there as an HIV Prevention Specialist. When I told Chris about being HIV POZ, he disappeared from my life. In a couple of months he reappeared with apologies and of course I fell under his spell again. Chris came up with an idea to create a fundraiser for VT CARES called “Winter Is A Drag Ball”: https://yolanda.net/winter-is-a-drag-ball which still exists to this day. Chris is no longer involved, but every year, I still go and perform at the ball. February 2025, was the 30th Anniversary.
I wrote my most popular song to this day during those early years at The Drag Ball. (side story: I was dating a man who worked with developmentally disabled children and he called them “Angels struggling to be human”). The song is called We Are Angels and it became an anthem for the LGBTQAI community around Burlington and now way beyond. I have recorded this song several times and in several musical styles. The latest version was in 2022 when a group of us were working on a musical version of my life story. This video contains pics of my 20 yr relationship with my husband Rev. Glen, the story of which I will share below. We Are Angels video here: https://youtu.be/yYs5HjXHG8U?si=1KoeulKVk2h1A-J9
Me and Chris’s relationship fell apart in 1999 right before the turn of the century. We were actually living together at the time, and I still had hope of having a loving and real relationship with him. On New Year's Eve, he came home in the late afternoon and told me he was just at a sex party with a group of my friends. This absolutely was the last straw for me. I exploded at the top of my lungs. I was so loud that it scared him and he ran out of the house. I couldn’t stop screaming even after he left. I was so enraged and heartbroken that I screamed and screamed so loud that the next door neighbor came over to see if I was ok. I ended it and never saw him again-except one time when he visited NYC in the mid-2000’s and I agreed to meet him for lunch. It had taken me 2 years to get over him and I felt strong. By that time I had become a minister and had a real husband (which is the main subject of the next section). I apologized for my part in our destructive relationship and he told me to fuck myself. After clearing my mind, heart and soul of this self destructive piece of my inner workings, I was able to fully move on and create the opening for
Chptr 6 - NYC Round 2- Yolanda takes Manhattan with her music-Glen Morton Ganaway- Seminary-20 years of marriage and ministry to the LGBTQAI Community:
The GREATEST love of my life with my husband Rev. Glen Morton Ganaway.
Song- The Greatest Love of My Life: https://youtu.be/xkyu4jMSAkM?si=aS2UjVjiX13CaSMr
In 1999, Yolanda and The Plastic Family were asked to be in the line up for a new, queer, monthly music event called Homocorps!
It was at the world famous CBGS rock club on the Bowery in the east village. We performed basically every month or so, got great fans and feedback, and learned about the downtown queer music world. We went frequently enough from Burlington VT to NYC, that I soon decided to move back to NYC and take it all on again with my newfound confidence as Yolanda !
I moved back to NYC about a month before 9/11 ! Was that a sign? Little did I know at the time what a wild ride it would be.
I moved into a Radical Faerie couple's loft (Fannie and Keisha aka Fussy) in a warehouse in Park Slope Brooklyn. It was fabulous beyond words. A whole floor in a once abandoned warehouse where artists squatted and made the building theirs. This couple's loft was basically Radical Faerie headquarters for Brooklyn. All kinds of fabulousness came out of that loft, including parties, photo shoots, concerts, and the art photography studios of Keisha and David Lee (Spike Lee's brother), both amazing photographers. Fannie and Keisha and this loft became an intimate part of my life. I even brought my Mother there one Christmas week while Fannie and Keisha were in India… around 2002 or 3. Pics of me by Keisha aka Keith Gemerek: https://yolanda.net/keithgemerekphotography
My Mom was awesome in the adventure department. I was house sitting at the loft and asked Mom to come have Christmas with me there…and she did! I picked her up at the airport. We took a cab to the Brooklyn loft building. The only way up to the third floor was by this big, old, rickety warehouse elevator that sometimes got stuck between floors. She was laughing and having fun all the way…and we got stuck between floors! OMG! She still didn't lose her humour or enthusiasm. Luckily we were almost at our floor and there was an overhead trap door in the ceiling of the elevator roof. I realized I could climb through the trap door to the floor above. David Lee lived on the same floor as Fannie and Keisha, so I opened the trap door and started calling David for help!! Luckily he was there and came and bent down to the ground and reached into the open space (a foot or 2) with his whole arm and told me to grab it and he could help me up. I don't remember exactly how I climbed up enough in the elevator to grab his hand and arm, but I did and he did pull me up! We both got up and were able to pull the elevator up a little bit by pulling on a chain that was to a pulley system in case of emergency.
Mom was still in the elevator. She wasn't scared or anything. She was waiting for us to tell her what to do. We figured we could both reach down far enough for her to grab our hands and we could grab her arms and pull her up through the trap door opening. Thanks and praise be to all the Gods and Goddesses we actually did it ! Mom didn't weigh much over 100 lbs and we managed to pull her up through the trap door. Mom was in her 60s at that time.
I moved out of the loft into a roommate situation in Sunset Park, Brooklyn. I got settled and began my plan to reform The Plastic Family in NYC and take the queer music scene by storm, and I did. My pics were showing up in downtown newspapers, and I was winning awards like Out Musician of the Year, Audience Favourite at The Fresh Fruit Festival, and The Stonewall Society LGBTQAI Hall of Fame.
But my favourite concert at that time was right after 9/11, and was a fundraiser for folks in our community who had lost so much during that disaster. This was the night I dressed as a nun and sang a re-written version of Sympathy for the Devil, where I mentioned the twin towers falling and some political commentary that I don't remember now…but the intent was to provoke! Any feeling…just provoke!
The performance took place in a Chinatown loft and there was no electricity because of the disaster that had just happened. The audience all had flashlights and were shining them at the stage. That was the performer's only light onstage.
Little did I know at the time, but my future husband, Glen aka Satyre, was one of the audience members holding a flashlight for me.
Pic above from that night.
I finally found my own place in Bay Ridge Brooklyn, and rode the long long subway ride to gigs in Manhattan with my guitar and a huge hockey bag full of drag and makeup. I would stay out all night gigging and drinking and smoking pot. By this time I was officially HIV POZ and in my mid 40’s. I was acting like I was in my mid 20’s. I wasn’t paying attention to HIV, and I was skipping meds. At the same time, I found a part time day job at an art studio that made hand made wallpaper. I went directly from partying all night to work. Soon, I was exhausted. I was in need of medical help. I found a Dr. that an HIV Poz friend of mine was going to. My friend looked radiantly healthy and I wanted to know what his Dr. would say to me. This Dr’s secret weapon was giving his patients testosterone. He looked at me and immediately said that I needed testosterone. I said “ok” , but had NO IDEA what a shock to my system this would be for me. All my life I had felt my inner life as a feminine being. I didn’t necessarily talk about it much because I thought that I was “supposed to be” a gay man, but actually I wasn’t.
When I started taking testosterone, that was my “sex change” moment. The steroids pushed me waaaaaaaaaayyyyyy into a male identity, sexuality, and power that I had never experienced before in my life-even in puberty. I was excited at first, because I thought WOW what an adventure. Everywhere I went, gay men were attracted to me in a whole new way. I started working out at the gym, developed a very male presence and went with it. I got hit on everywhere I went, gym, street, and even at work. One day when I got to the building where I worked, a really hot guy from the street followed me into the building and got on the elevator with me. It was only the 2 of us. He reached over and pushed the STOP button on the elevator. The elevator stopped and he literally threw himself on me. It was beyond what I could handle. I got the elevator running again, got to my floor and pushed him out of the way. That truly weirded me out. Also the testosterone accentuated whatever aggressive feelings were in me. I started yelling at people for no real reason. This testosterone experience was a double edged sword.
Song: I Wanna Know: https://youtu.be/cHpkH1X6piU?si=JpwPv6kvEq600ZOO
Me during the testosterone years:
During this time, I became a member of a queer music organization called Outmusic, where I met my dear friend to this day- singer songwriter and producer Freddy Freeman. Freddy was/is a celeb in the gay male “Bear” community. He started a touring show called “Bearapalooza” featuring Bear identified artists. He started this event (which later toured the country), in NYC in a basement venue in the Village. He asked me to be the very first drag queen host of the event. I loved that idea because as I said at the event “I’m so glad I’m with the Bears tonight because I didn’t have to shave my back! “ When Bearapalooza went on the road, I went also. Freddy and I also created a queer music night at CBGBs called Q-Nity. As time went on,Freddy met his husband Jay, they moved to Nashville, then a Gay Campground in GA., and finally to a Gay Retreat center in upstate NY called Easton Mountain. At Easton, Freddy became spiritually grounded and created an ongoing event there called Bear Your Soul. This event is still ongoing as of this writing. Freddy and I became very close and he produced 2 of my albums Country Gospel Kirtan 1: https://yolanda.net/album/1302115/rev-yolanda-s-country-gospel-kirtan-vol-1-god-is
and 2: https://yolanda.net/album/1302097/rev-yolanda-s-country-gospel-kirtan-vol-2-step-back
as well as other live performances with my events “Church With A 2 Drink Minimum”: https://yolanda.net/church , and “The Circle of Love”: https://yolanda.net/circle
NOW for the BIGGEST BREAKTHROUGH in my life- meeting my beloved husband and soul mate Rev. Glen Morton Ganaway- Integral Mentor and “Your Favourite Anarchist Preacher”.
https://yolanda.net/rev-glenganaway
As mentioned before, Glen aka Satyre (his Faerie name) was one of the folks that attended the 911 concert in the Chinatown loft, but he didn’t introduce himself that night. He introduced himself a few weeks later at a Radical Faerie Circle at The LGBTQAI Center in NYC on 13th st. After the circle he came up to me and said “Why aren’t we fucking?” … LOL…. I was a bit shocked, however, at this time I was still on testosterone, and these things seemed to happen all the time.
That Thanksgiving, Fanny and Keisha, who owned the loft I mentioned before, had a Thanksgiving party. Glen came to the party. It was raining that day and he got soaked on his way to the event. Fanny and Keisha had a washer dryer, so he put his clothes in the dryer and sat out on the landing only in his underwear. I hadn’t arrived yet, but when I did, I walked up the stairs to the landing and there was my beautiful Glen aka Satyre, sitting on the landing in his underwear smoking a cigarette. I was blown away because he was GORGEOUS! Yoga body and tan with tattoos all over…WOW! I walked up to the landing and said something like “you-here- now” and we went at it right there on the landing. OMG!
From that day on we were practically inseparable. He had just moved into his own apartment and I had mine. We didn’t move in together for about 2 years while our relationship grew. I spent most of my time at his apartment. I started cooking for him and he loved my cooking, so he and I began to create our own cuisine called “Elvishna” (Southern cooking with a far eastern Indian twist). I still have the cookbook.
Soon after we got together (I was still on testosterone. My drag became more rock androgynous, and I presented as Roger when I was out of drag), I was performing with Hedda Lettuce and Porshe at a supper club called East of 8th (8th Avenue Manhattan, Chelsea). We were first called “Dixie Chicks with Dicks”, but the actual Dixie Chicks had some kinda problem with it, so we changed it to “Chixie Dix”. So, a rich Asian lawyer and his Australian husband came up to us and said they were starting a Queer Record Label and that label's first project was to be called Abbalicious.
Abbalicious was featuring 10 NYC Drag Queens each singing a different ABBA song, in their own style. We also sang a group song - Mamma Mia. My song was a blues version of Lay All Your Love on Me: https://youtu.be/owCGzTm8f6s?si=iYrbFrW_VLSk8cLk
I loved everything about that song and that experience creating the album. In the above video you'll see my gender fuck look I favoured at the time.
FigJam (the record company), also said they would produce my next solo album. They also signed my friend Freddy Freeman with the same promise. They had me partner with a guitarist I had never worked with before and an interesting pop rock sound was beginning to develop. I felt so good.
Soon I got the notice that FigJam was folding and filing bankruptcy. Needless to say that CD didn't get made ….. until a year or so later after meeting guitarist/songwriter/producer Robert Urban. We finished the album called “House of Joy”: https://yolanda.net/album/1302117/house-of-joy
And recorded an EP at CBCGB’s: https://yolanda.net/album/1302103/live-at-cbgb-s
Turns out that Abbalicious got nowhere because (according to FigJam) our release date coincided with Mama Mia the movie, which of course got all of the attention. 😂 what evvvvvvsss. Anyway, another heartbreaking event for me. I so wanted to have a legit recording career. Turns out that I went and created my own unique path. Spirit living that path through me. It's been awesome !
Glen was there for me, and I just stayed with him 24/7 at his place. I cooked and cooked and we ate and ate and watched Star Trek, read all kinds of sci fi together, and somewhere in there we picked up A Course In Miracles.
Glen went waaaaay into it and read all 3 books of it 4-5 times back to back. He found an ACIM weekend retreat in New Hampshire, and we went. At that event we met Rev. Regina Dawn Akers, who had just published her book The Holy Spirit's Interpretation of the New Testament. She was awesome, we got a signed copy and I still have it.
Soon after that retreat, we began to go to Unity of NYC at Symphony Space and met an ACIM teacher Rev. Shawn Moninger who we became close to. Shawn's husband is successful songwriter David Friedman. We became personal friends and attended their home for Thanksgiving for several years, as well as speaking and singing at Shawn's Church, Unity Center of Norwalk CT.
By this time in our lives, we both began to realize that we wanted to be ministers. Glen's dad was a baptist Preacher who worked as a chaplain for the navy when they were growing up (for Glen's bio and video, go HERE). Glen knew he was also called to ministry and had been in many different spiritual paths as had I, so we decided to go to One Spirit Interfaith Seminary in NYC.
At this time, I was considering getting off of testosterone. Some of my Dr's patients were getting cancer because of the steroids. Glen agreed it would be a good idea, and that's when my transition to being comfortable with my feminine nature began. Glen nurtured that transition and I truly became Rev. Yolanda under his nurturing presence. The man was Love Incarnate. I fell in love with him all over again. He met me as a macho gym looking guy, and also nurtured and loved that guy who thought they had to be macho ( in order to somehow “protect themselves”) into an understanding of their natural feminine personality … loving me all the way. Never skipped a beat. Always a constant loving presence. I thank The Goddess for my husband.
This first time I used she/her pronouns in public Glen didn't miss a beat. I didn't know I was gonna introduce myself as she in this circle, until I was actually in the circle “. Not a batted eyelash, Glen got it immediately.
In Seminary we were in separate classes. Both he and I had troubles with the powers that be at the Seminary because of how we wanted to express ourselves through our clothing. After 2 years of work and study and uncovering my authentic self in the Seminary journey, I decided to graduate as Rev. Yolanda Roger Anthony Mapes. I had a mentor who suggested that the world could use trans femme ministers and I agreed. I told the president of the Seminary about my decision. She wasn't happy about it. When I showed up for graduation, I was told to take off the high heels that I was wearing or not graduate. Faced with that decision, I took them off and graduated barefoot. During the Ordination ceremony, the Seminary president announced each one in our class to the public with their name and their title of Reverend. I had asked to be ordained as Rev.Yolanda Roger Anthony Mapes. She was hesitant. When she came to me she bent down and whispered in my ear “Are you sure you want to do this?” … of course I did! So I was ordained and took on the name Rev. Yolanda.
Glen had a similar experience. Glen considered himself “The Sacred Trickster”, and he took this seriously! He created a Jester outfit to graduate in. That was NOT ok with the powers that be. He didn’t pay any attention at all to them and graduated as the Sacred Trickster that he was.
After graduation in 2011, Glen proposed to me, and we got married in the NYC Halloween Parade 2011. Here’s how I told that story at an NPR storytelling event in March 2026:
I was standing in a very small kitchen in a very small apartment in a pre-war building in Bay Ridge Brooklyn. Its the Summer of 2011. It's gross, hot, sticky, humid, sweaty. I don’t know if you’ve ever been to Brooklyn in the Summer, but it's a LOT like my hometown of Muscle Shoals Alabama or even worse- Memphis in the Summer. It's even hotter in the kitchen because the oven is 400 degrees and there’s no ventilation or air conditioning so all of the smoke and grease blows back on me.
In the living room is the Love of my life watching TV. Rev. Glen Morton Ganaway aka your favorite anarchist preacher, and my dream man. 6’2” long lanky yoga body, sandy blonde hair balding on top, those sparkling green eyes with the cute little professor glasses over them, and that huge, intelligent, sweet goofy smile of his- with his one cracked tooth right in front. My perfect man.
He’s the political junkie and I’m not. I’m the artist and cook and I love to cook. He loves to eat my cooking- so that’s terrific! Tonight I’m making one of his favorite meals- roasted chicken with a Garam Masala coating on the skin, fantasy cornbread (he calls it) with bacon on the bottom of the pan and melted cheddar cheese on top. And of course mashed potatoes and gravy with black eyed peas and collard greens… because we’re Southern.
I hear him call from the other room for me to come in and watch TV with him. I don’t want to because I'm gross, greasy and busy making dinner. Then he says that it's really important because the NY State legislature is about to vote on the marriage Equality bill.
Marriage- I hadn’t thought much about it. It was impossible for me anyway. It would never get passed, so I didn’t spend much time thinking about it.
Then I hear him say- “Hurry they’re voting”.... So OK! I pull off that nasty apron and go into the living room to watch the vote. Lo and Behold- they passed it! Hallelujah- what an historic moment!
At that moment- Glen dropped to his knees and said “Will you marry me”?
And in a flash- I realized what I had wanted all these years- a home. I never had a home before. Not with my birth family or any other man I had been with, but with Glen I had a home. He was my husband. So… I said YES!
He jumped up and held me in his arms telling me he loved me and holding me close… and all of these marriage fantasies that I didn't even know I had, came flooding into my mind! I looked at him and said that I knew where I wanted to get married… the NYC Halloween Parade! He looked a bit shocked, but said YES! We all said yes!
3 months later, my Cinderella storybook wedding unfolded. We rented a horse and carriage and dressed up to the 9’s. With me in my Maryilyn Monroe inspired glory and he dressed as his totem animal The Raven. We were The Divine Masculine and The Divine Feminine riding in that carriage with a couple thousand or more people (including Vermont’s very own Bread and Puppet Theater) waving the “Royal Wave” with our hands and saying “Thanks for coming to our wedding”. It was so fabulous and fun! The greatest day of my life.
What I thought was impossible- HAPPENED! And what I never thought I wanted, turned out to be the only thing I ever wanted.
photos by Richard Mitchell
See more pics video and our NY1 interview from our Halloween Parade Wedding:
https://yolanda.net/halloween-wedding
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rv_i1-Xj_o0
Also right after graduation from One Spirit Seminary, I created a cabaret show as my first official act as Rev. Yolanda. It was called “Rev. Yolanda’s Old Time Gospel Hour”. It was a hit in the NYC cabaret scene, and I won 2 MAC (Manhattan Cabarets and Clubs) awards for the 2 part show. A movie was made of the show, by a Colorado filmmaker, and a tour to Colorado to promote the movie was next. The movie included footage from the show and interviews with me and Glen. Glen said his now famous speech about the care and feeding of Yolanda: “ 1. Never touch her when she’s asleep, 2. Always make sure there is a jar of peanut butter and a jar of mayonnaise handy, and 3. If she is inconsolable, she’s probably just hot. Take her to a grocery store with a walk-in beer cooler and let her rest awhile”. LOL!
Movie: https://yolanda.net/movie
soundtrack: https://yolanda.net/album/1302099/rev-yolanda-s-old-time-gospel-hour-live
The movie didn’t make as big a splash as we were hoping. It wasn’t marketed well to the LGBTQAI, and the spiritual community at the time wasn't as open to it as we had hoped. We were scheduled to have me sing at 2 Unity Churches in Colorado and they both backed out AFTER I had already arrived in Colorado.
When we returned to NYC after the trip to Colorado, Glen and I decided to start a 'church’ on our own called “Church With A 2 Drink Minimum” …. https://yolanda.net/church
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzsDUC22i5w&list=PLM1XU1JEHYfMHzAth1mWfzxj3E-HS6SzK
Church With A 2 Drink Minimum was at the now defunct club Sidewalk Cafe in the East Village NYC. It was a success as we did it live for several years until COVID. During COVID we moved online. This event reached the LGBTQAI NYC community and beyond. When we did it live for those years, every year we did it, a world religions class from Elon University in N. Carolina would make a yearly trip to NYC to study different expressions of spirituality and they always came to Church!
My life with Glen was truly perfect. He was indeed the man of my dreams that I had been searching for all of my life and with all of my experiences with other men-as described above. He was strong, tall, handsome, goofy, very very intelligent and a spiritual powerhouse- literally my guru/lover/best friend. In all my life, and in all of his life, this was the first time we ever felt at home -ANYWHERE with anyone.
song HOME: https://yolanda.net/track/1981907/home ,
official video: https://youtu.be/dEUkJMi373s?si=SmUMUG6-l8Cf6mPM
In 2020 during the height of COVID, Glen and I bought 4 ½ acres of land in VT - intended to be our forever home. We called it “Gloryland”. We decided that at the end of our lease in July 2024, we would move full time to our property in VT. We were so excited to create our forever home, that we went up to the property almost every weekend from 2020-2023 to begin to build our dream home. Glen asked me to promise him that we would both live until we were 100, and that we would pass away together on our land. I made that promise to him, even though I wasn’t sure I wanted to live that long, but with him by my side, I surely would. We were so very in love with each other and the land and our plans for the future. Nothing could stand in the way, or so we thought.
In February of 2024, Glen called me while I was on the road performing at a huge event in Burlington VT - Winter Is A Drag Ball: https://yolanda.net/winter-is-a-drag-ball , and told me he was experiencing extreme nausea and acid reflux. I didn’t think much about it. I suggested pepto bismal and told him I’d be home soon. When I got back home, his nausea was worse and I asked him to please go to the doctor which he flatly refused to do. This went on for a couple of weeks when it got even worse. Finally in March 2024, his face began to swell up and he couldn’t breathe well. We finally went to a doctor and she was definitely alarmed and wanted him to go to the hospital. He would NOT. Glen had worked for doctors for many years, and had no trust in them or the hospital's systems. The Dr. he was seeing at this point gave us a breathing apparatus that infused medicine into his system. We went home with that machine and got ready for bed. He had to be propped up in the bed so he could breathe. Around 3am on March 14 2024- he shot up in the bed, gave a gasp and fell into my arms and stopped breathing. I called 911-all the while pumping his chest and breathing into his mouth. It took 10 minutes for the emergency team to get there. He was not breathing. They were gonna declare him dead on the spot, but one of them detected a pulse, so they took him to the hospital. I called his family in North Carolina and they drove up to NYC as quickly as they could. They arrived at the hospital at 11pm on March 14. Glen’s Mom touched his face and she said “you were so easy to love”. It was heartbreaking and true- Glen WAS the easiest person to love. His joy of life was contagious. He would always call me the moment he left work, and when I asked what he was doing, he would ALWAYS say “I’m just walking down the street saying HI to ALL the people I meet.” He was a friend to ALL. The good, the bad and the ugly. Glen’s body stopped functioning at 11:15 on March 14 2024. That was our usual bedtime for 20 years. I believe he actually passed over in my arms that night, but his soul kept his body functioning until his Mother could get there. According to the attending doctor- Glen had a heart attack.
I was completely devastated.
My future was gone.
My home was gone.
My best friend was gone.
My Soul Mate was gone.
I felt betrayed and afraid.
I pulled together a huge memorial service on his birthday May 14, 2024: https://yolanda.net/rev-glenganaway
I decided to leave NYC and all of my friends and accomplishments and move to Gloryland full time to start a new life. I had no running water, no electricity, no partner, but I couldn’t live in NYC anymore. I sorted out all of the necessities of life- well, electricity, a vintage 1967 mobile home, and adopted 2 cats Satyre (Glen’s Faerie name) and Jolie (Glen’s nickname for me).
In February, 2025, as I was answering emails, I received an audition call from The Telsey Office in NYC. They asked me to submit an audition tape for a role they felt was perfect for me. It was a guest star TV role, but I wasn’t told anything about what TV show it was for. I loved the script. It was a trans woman’s story of her dreams fulfilled. It was beautifully and respectfully written. A week later, I received a phone call that I got the role. It was for a new Ryan Murphy TV series called The Beauty. I accepted the role and a few days later a black limo pulled up in front of my 1967 vintage trailer and escorted me to the airport to fly to NYC where another limo took me to a boutique hotel in Brooklyn. I was given the full star treatment for this production! It really was the greatest moment of my entire career. You can see my scenes and reviews here: https://yolanda.net/actor
The most interesting/unusual thing about filming this show was that it was filmed during the first anniversary week of Glen’s passing and the last day of shooting was the exact date of Glen’s passing- March 14. I feel- I know- that Glen, from the other side, orchestrated this for me. His presence was VERY real during this filming. In the scene I reference on my website above, as I’m talking to the actor in front of me Glen appeared transposed over his face. I felt a multi-dimensional experience taking place, where Glen and ALL of the lovers in my life were there cheering me on.
From that time until now, I have had visions and felt experiences of me and Glen’s multi-dimensional lives together on this planet and on different planets in the Pleiades star system. Me and Glen’s love for sci-fi became real. I saw our lives in ancient Sumeria, and in the Pleiadian star system as we sat before the inter galactic council and told them we wanted to go to earth together and explore our love story through the earth experience. From Sumeria to NYC. I believe we did that and are still connected for many more adventures as he guides me through the rest of this earth and beyond. Glen and I are forever connected, and forever in love.
Something I have realized through writing all of this down is that my life reflects the connection between sexuality and spirituality. Sexuality and spirituality are deeply interconnected, often viewed as two sides of the same coin representing desire, energy, and longing for connection. When integrated, sexuality becomes a sacred act of intimacy, presence, and divine union rather than merely a physical act. It can act as a bridge, transforming physical energy into spiritual awareness and emotional closeness. This bridge is what I finally found in Rev. Glen Ganway who viewed sexual energy as a way to connect with the divine, fostering a union that mirrors spiritual ecstasy. I believe we have shared this connection over many lifetimes and on different planets and multiple dimensions.
As of now 2026, I live with my sweet cats Satyre and Jolie in Southern VT, and am starting a new life as I turn 70yrs old in August 2026.
Many photos, videos, podcasts and more about me and Glen and the life journey I’ve been on at my website: www.yolanda.net or www.RevYolanda.com and https://yolanda.net/rev-glenganaway